On Retiring

My friends assured me I would know when I was “ready” to retire. I had worked for 22 years at a private school in California and prior to that as a Librarian and Medical Records Officer at a hospital in Dubai for 16 years. How could I be sure? I would “feel it,” they said.

I planned my retirement journey making sure I kept myself busy, especially during the first year. Sitting around the house wondering what was going on at work was something I did not want to do! So I switched to working part-time thus easing myself into retirement.

Stunning dark gray clouds cover the horizon

Traveling was at the top of my to-do list. I had looked forward to showing my granddaughter the city where I lived for twenty years, where her mother attended school. So on a sunny afternoon in February 2016, we took an Emirates flight out of San Francisco. Dubai has grown phenomenally as a city since 1991, but I was eager to show her the places we frequented years ago. The beautiful dhows still cruise along on the creek packed with passengers. How many mornings we had spent walking along Dubai Creek or taking our children to the nearby parks in the evenings. The gold souk with its display of heavy gold jewelry was still the same.

We went to the spice market filled with colorful spices from Iran, India, and the Middle East. The World Trade Center which was once the tallest building in Dubai is now dwarfed by taller and grander skyscrapers.

Dubai Spice Market

My granddaughter had a list of new restaurants, shopping malls, and tourist attractions for us to visit. We started with a trip to the Miracle Gardens, a 30-minute ride from our hotel. Considered the world’s largest natural flower garden, it currently has a display of 150 million flowers in full bloom though it was much less then. Finding a taxi back to our hotel was a struggle. Every taxi that approached was quickly surrounded by three or four families. Whoever got in the car first got the ride! Were it not for my young travel companion I don’t know how long I would have waited to get back to our hotel.

Reconnecting with old friends from Hyderabad was one of the best actions I have taken. Now I have a new support group of friends who are going through the same stage in life as I am. We get so much pleasure just chatting over a cup of chai or coffee, going to the mall, or driving together to a party.

Even if they don’t live close by just being able to talk on the phone is reassuring. I’m relieved to know I am not the only one getting a little nervous about flying, or what to expect after cataract surgery.

Walking is the one activity I had kept up all these years, it was more like an exercise to be checked off my list. Now my walks are becoming increasingly pleasant. I have begun to notice flowers, listen to the birds, and oh, the feeling of awe looking up at the sky on a cold windy day. The stunning dark gray clouds dominate the horizon. The sunlight falls on a lone tree. With an iPhone always at hand I often capture the scene, though I wish I could take better pictures. My children tell me I should upgrade my phone. One day I might even take lessons in photography.

Best of all I am so grateful to be able to spend more time with my grandchildren.

The first year went by …

In our backyard

I had missed many out-of-state family gatherings during my working life. Now I decided I would attend as many events as I could. So in August 2017, off I went to Pakistan for a wedding. It was a joy to participate in the happy event and meet relatives whom I had not seen for years.

Out of genuine concern and curiosity, my friends, especially the younger ones, want to know what I do at home. My immediate thought is “I am never bored.”

It's been seven years since I retired.

I hope I am not wasting my time. Words of warning and advice passed on to me over the years flash through my mind. “You will have to answer for what you did with the time given to you,” “To waste time is to waste your life,” and more recently “Make good use of your newly found freedom.”

Evening sunlight creates a beautiful outline of the tree

I often stop to think. What did I do yesterday or what will I do tomorrow? Yesterday I went back to sleep after fajr prayers because I hadn’t slept well earlier. Later I prepared dinner, just a few simple dishes, nothing elaborate. The weather was beautiful so I went for a walk in the neighborhood. Did my laundry.

I made notes for my next blog post.

I called up a friend from whom I hadn’t heard for some time. It turns out her phone was not working. Nothing to worry about.

The day before I was re-framing my grandchildren’s photos. The kids are all grown up now and I thought it was time to replace the old photos. I spent a few hours going through my Google photo albums. I got constantly sidetracked looking at pictures of our vacations, my children’s weddings, and birthdays. I finally found the photos I was looking for, the ones that captured their beautiful personalities.

Tomorrow I plan to go through my file cabinet and minimize the papers I have been collecting for years or maybe go to the mall near my house.

Some of these tasks are fun, and some a little cumbersome but I am always learning something new.

I like to watch movies and dramas on my laptop so I got a large 15-inch screen. It is a little heavy to carry around but I would rather put up with the inconvenience. My favorites are old Hollywood movies like Roman Holiday, An Affair to Remember, War and Peace, Desiree, and the list goes on. Dramas from the Indian sub-continent bring back memories.

Turkish dramas are my new favorites. I don’t understand the Turkish language but I got used to following the story with English subtitles. The actors are very talented and the dramas are well written. I just finished watching Yunus Emre, a drama about the famous Turkish poet and Sufi mystic.

Watched some of the Wimbledon Championship events last week.

Am I doing enough? I call up my friends to see what they think? Some feel at our age we have done enough so it is time to relax, others are far more active than me.

I am not doing anything exceptional, it's just that now I am savoring every moment of what I do. Somewhere during the lockdown, I took an online class offered by Dr. Laurie Santos called “The Science of Well-Being” which encourages people to have a positive outlook on life and savor everything they do. The desire to live a fulfilling life is not just limited to Ivy Leaguers, according to Dr. Santos. It requires effort though, I have to constantly remind myself to stay on course.

Writing about my childhood in Hyderabad, my wonderful parents, and the places where I lived, was something I always wanted to do. I did not know if I could write well enough to turn my writings into a book. My daughter came to my rescue and suggested I start writing a blog.

I enjoy blog writing and working at my own pace. It is a learning experience. I read that a blog can be printed in book form? I will have to do some research on that. Let's wait and see.

And yes, I made one more overseas trip to Istanbul, Turkey, in April 2018. It's a beautiful city. I would love to go there again and see more of the country, its people, and its culture.